Saturday, April 14, 2007

Bowling – does it bring out the ape inside you?

Okay, so last night we feted a friend’s birthday at a bowling alley! I am sure you are wondering ‘gee, it’s not like you went to the moon’. Hold your satire, sire because I had the first-hand opportunity of seeing humans dilapidate – man to ape. Showing mental acquisitiveness to learn about your ancestors is astute; however, exhibiting the same rawness in your comportment that marked the ice age, is benightedness. Here is what I saw: people devoured onto buffalo wings and chicken tenders, then semi-wiped their hands on their derriere, and nonchalantly stood up to bowl. Oh, the humanity!

The next few lines might sound like vicious rambling, but I have to blurt it out or else I will choke. Here goes: God, I hate bowling alleys! What is the big deal about wearing someone's feculent shoes and bedaubing food on huge multi-colored begrimed bowling balls? I am not trying to be a snob, but I think bowling is an unsanitary sport. It brings out the barbaric side in all of us – back to crude basics.

Well, I survived the evening with 'I am having a great time' smile on my face right so that no one could suspect the emotional turmoil I was going through. Honestly, even a hot shower on reaching home could not take-away the dirty feeling – like someone had desecrated the shrine.

Copyright © 04.14.2007

5 comments:

opinionated said...

I'll say upfront: I like bowling. So whatever I write here on forth, is tinged with my positive bias (as against your negative bias) of the game.

Humans dilapidating - man to ape?! Hold you horses there!! An evening out at the lanes is nothing other than an opportunity to enjoy a sport that can be played as a group. And with all due respect to wearing someone's 'feculent shoes', you always have the option of getting your own; and the same is the case for 'begrimed bowling balls', just get your own if that is what creeps you so much.

Do people do what you just described? Sure they do, but if that is what disgusts you - don't generalize and blame the sport.

And as far as the human behavior.. Well, sometimes people just want to have fun.. not care about all the Ps and Qs.. If you don't care much for it, don't indulge in it; but don't belittle others just becasue it is something you can't get yourself to do.

Anonymous said...

Well!There is always another surface of the coin.Barbarism in sports have always remained with human race.Degree varies.

Anonymous said...

opinionated, you seem like a grouchy old man. personally, i hate bowling aleys too. the sport is fine but it's the environment which is awful!!! twocenst is right. evolution has taught us better things.

Curious said...

Seems like you went to one of those nasty ones....I personally feel bowling is an interesting game and I enjoy myself a lot when I am there. Its a different story that I gulp a gallon of beer by the time I am done with one game :))

Anonymous said...

even though they spray disinfectants on the shoes, it's unsanitary. bowling shoes are gross! i also don't like my nails breaking.