Mind Your Own Business

We live in an over communicated world where most people feel entitled to an opinion on just about anything. “Have mouth; must speak.” Nothing wrong with expressing what’s on your mind but in a civilized society, there have to be parameters. What happened to “Live and let live?” Two people don’t have to agree on the same issue or feel the exact same way to co-exist in this society. Mutual respect should be enough to tide us through life.

So, where is my sarcasm stemming from? Most of you must have read or heard about the California Supreme Court’s stance on same-sex marriages. Up until now, I haven’t really written about the “trials and triumphs” of the gay community because my blog posts are opinions based on my experiences. I wondered if I would do true justice to an issue that I truly have no real knowledge about. But the California incident made me upset, as a human, and gave me the reason to embrace malignant honestitis, grab my verbal megaphone, and rant.

A simple question: As humans, what is our problem? Why do we feel so threatened by anyone who is different from us? Someone said to me the other day, “But how can two men be together? Yuck! It’s unnatural.” I was baffled both by the candidness and the undertone of bigotry. So, it’s politically inappropriate to bring up “color” and “race” in social settings, but it’s okay to openly condemn same-sex marriage? Why the double standards?

Let’s get real: We all like to believe that marriages last forever, but statistics and real world stories show that a marriage between man and woman doesn’t always translate to “forever and ever.” As an example, look at the divorce rate in America. Research says that forty or fifty percent of marriages might end in divorce if the current trend continues. The divorce rates in India might be lower than America, but it's on the rise. Up until a few years ago, at least for Indians, divorce was something that happened to a friend’s friend’s acquaintance; but today, separations have penetrated our inner circle of friends. So, it’s okay for us heteros to get wedded and then annul the nuptials but not acceptable for same-sex couples to enter into matrimony? Hmm. Why don’t we work on our own lives and save our relationships before lashing out at someone else’s preferences?

According to the religious pundits and the constitution, “Marriage is the union between a man and a woman.” Maybe so, but I am unsure how and why the state or the church get involved in someone’s life choices. Do they tell us heterosexuals whom we can or can’t marry? Do these people, who serve God (in any religion), really hold everything written in the religious books sacred to their heart? If that were the case, we wouldn’t have pedophiles in places of worship. Or what about these cases of schoolteachers raping minors or sports coaches molesting malleable minds?

I have heard a lot of straight guys confess that they are paranoid about gay dudes hitting on them. Talk about being full of yourself. The whole thought process reeks of ignorance and absurdity--and maybe a little sanctimonious. Do these heterosexuals hit on every single member of the opposite sex? I hardly think so. If in the hetero world we are picky about whom we befriend, date, and marry, so why assume it’s any different in the gay community? They too are humans with standards.

If I have my numbers right, as of today, there are six states in America that recognize gay marriages. Is it fair that straight people are entitled to freedom of choice (in terms of matrimony) and the gay community isn’t? My plea is that you don’t have to “get” their choices; just let them be. There are enough aspects of life that we don’t understand (For example, I don’t get the art or charm of smoking) but we go about our day out of respect for humanity. Freedom is freedom and should be the same for all.

More until next time.

Xoxo

Copyright © 06.04.2009


“Tolerance is giving to every other human being every right that you claim for yourself.”- Robert Green Ingersoll

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