Pandora's Box

Dussehra brings nerdy news...

2011-10-06T10:22:00.005-04:00

Over 18 months ago, I went to Portugal for a writing residency. The residency was in the southwestern part of the country. The afternoon that I reached, the director drove a bunch of us to see eucalyptus forests. Most of the eucalyptus trees were being replaced with oak trees. That very trip sparked the idea for my upcoming chapbook of poems, Beyond the Scent of Sorrow.

I write to a dead man

2011-09-22T08:39:00.003-04:00

In the past few years, I have lost quite a few of my aunts and uncles—on both my mom and dad’s side of the family. None of these people were old. Early sixties. Having seen death visit my family so closely and frequently, the person inside of me feels guarded; the philosopher, emotional around words. When I was in India in the month of August, my mausa (Mom’s sister’s

What a month away in India taught me

2011-09-12T10:57:00.004-04:00

Yes, I am back from my almost four-week long trip to India. Many of you have emailed and asked me to share my experiences and pictures from the book launch and other events. I apologize for the delay. A few days after I returned from India, we headed to Minneapolis to attend my husband’s cousin’s wedding. Any excuse to meet with the family, catch up on chitchat, and dance

Embarking on a journey

2011-07-29T10:08:00.004-04:00

I know, I know. I have been MIA for a while. My schedule has been nutty. Pardon me if I haven’t responded to your notes or messages. Or haven’t initiated communication. So, aside from the day-to-day commitments, what’s kept me buried is the upcoming launch of my novel: Perfectly Untraditional. The formal event is in New Delhi on Friday, August 5 at 5:30 p.m. at the Attic. A week from today. So…

Are adults messed up?

2011-06-21T10:08:00.003-04:00

My friend’s five-year-old spotted a lady in a burqa the other day and said, “Mom, that is such a cool Ninja outfit!” My friend, who is an awesome mother, was relieved to find out that the woman hadn’t heard her little one’s comments. I was amazed when I heard the story. The kid’s observation wasn’t tainted by time, politics, or society. He made sense of the garb, from his

Living on borrowed time

2011-06-09T22:58:00.003-04:00

Sorry, I have been absconding for over a month now. My husband and I were on a literary, artsy tour in Europe followed by a wonderful trip to Wisconsin. Both the visits were incredibly special in their own way. While Europe was a revelation on an emotional level and a treat to the exhausted mind, Wisconsin was brilliant for meeting our deadlines, spending quality time with

Introducing "Perfectly Untraditional": My first, fiction novel

2011-05-04T22:08:00.005-04:00

Some prayers go unanswered. Some carve a path and make wishes come true.Indescribable amount of hard work, frustrations, tears, fears, smiles, heartaches, and perseverance went into turning my dream into reality. Ladies and gentleman, I present to you: Perfectly Untraditional (Niyogi Books)—my first fiction novel. I am ecstatic, delirious, and

Their graves will not be unknown

2011-04-29T07:57:00.002-04:00

We were in Maryland this past weekend, celebrating my aunt-in-law’s surprise 60th birthday. As always, it was amazing meeting all the cousins and partaking in regular family fun: food, chitchat, cackle, and stories. We all got talking. The family in the room knew that I was a writer. But they didn’t know about my deadlines or forthcoming books. I, personally, don’t fancy

Gay or straight, doesn’t matter. It’s the Y chromosome!

2011-04-21T10:46:00.004-04:00

It’s my husband’s birthday today. A friend suggested that I write a post about him—my husband. Initially I found the idea odd only because I rarely plan my posts. The ideas come to me. I have to be consumed with a topic to blog about it. But as I sat down with my laptop earlier today, I had an epiphany. After all, Mr. Frost said, “Writing is discovery.” My husband, a man of

Are we ready to clean, India?

2011-04-14T08:04:00.005-04:00

When I was growing up, I didn’t know of anyone who wanted to enter politics in India. None of my friends, peers, or acquaintances. We might not have had official “Career Day” in school, but every time youngsters discussed their career aspirations, politics didn’t appear in the list. Politics was meant for certain people. People who were not only okay

Cricket brings out the bigot in all of us!

2011-03-31T00:22:00.005-04:00

Wednesday, March 30, 2011 was a nail biting day for Indians and Pakistanis across the world. Some of our friends made it to Mohali, India to watch this legendary match. Legendary: umm, this was probably Cricket God Sachin Tendulkar’s last world cup. So, yeah. Legendary! The saying, “Cricket and cinema are India’s religion,” isn’t an exaggeration! When we woke up on the

"Not All Birds Sing"

2011-03-23T18:24:00.010-04:00

The world is trembling. A lot has happened in the past couple of weeks: massacre in Libya; earthquake in Japan; bomb blast in Jerusalem. The legendary Elizabeth Taylor is dead. I have endured a few personal losses too. And so have others close to me. But let's not talk about the chaos and my thoughts on the mayhem until next week. It's Thursday morning. Another day closer to the weekend. Time to

It’s okay to shut up

2011-03-10T09:01:00.002-05:00

At the beginning of this week, I received a few emails from some wonderful readers. They wanted to know about my “missing” blog. Since I didn’t post anything last week, folks asked if all was well. I know, it’s hard to believe that someone as opinionated as me had nothing to say for an entire week. :-) Hardly the case, I promise. :-) I had plenty of thoughts racing through

Childhood memories replaced with nightmares

2011-02-24T08:38:00.000-05:00

I have had a transient life growing up. Different schools, different friends, different, countries, different cities. One of those countries where my parents lived and I visited for fifteen years was Libya. I studied in the Indian International School in Libya for a few years. That is until my parents realized that school was a piece of cake, and all my teachers were

Do a good deed and save the life of a three-year old

2011-02-09T15:10:00.012-05:00

For those of you who watch the ABC sitcom, “Cougar Town,” starring Courteney Cox, you might remember an episode from a week or so ago. It was based on the concept of “Pay it forward.” You do something nice for someone or say a few generous words, and they in turn do the same for another person—friend or a stranger. In the end, a chain of good deeds gets manufactured. But

Cinema in India—sign of the changing times?

2011-02-03T11:04:00.005-05:00

The only reason I can smile around this time of the year (Well, the cold and snow freezes every happy emotion) is because of movie and television awards. Though I have to say my favorite de-stressor is watching innumerable Bollywood award ceremonies, especially in the recent years. C’mon, there is music, dancing, celebrities, and fashion galore. And loads of sharp and

HOT news on yet another cold day

2011-01-26T11:53:00.010-05:00

I was saying to a friend the other day, we make fun of the English for starting their conversations (or at least sneaking excerpts of it) with weather, but we all have been doing the same off late. I don’t even need to browse through Weather Channel's website; Facebook has people sharing their temperature-plight. This other friend, she and I were at the same workshop last

No home to call their own

2011-01-14T09:34:00.003-05:00

The other night, after work, I met up with a good friend for a cup of steaming hot latte. It was a cold evening, and the café was just the perfect place to play catch up without being caught in the snow. Aside from our love for words, this friend and I have another thing in common: our nomadic upbringing. We both grew up across different countries and cultures. While she

I am pro-choice!

2011-01-06T08:33:00.010-05:00

In the third quarter of 2010, France banned Islamic face-coverings: burqa and niqab. I was in England at the time for a literary festival. That particular weekend, I happened to stay with a couple, dear friends, who happened to be of different faiths. The guy was Hindu while the girl was Muslim. Both the guy and I like (kinda worship) our French, red wines. Anyway,

"I am awesome!"

2011-01-02T09:49:00.004-05:00

Before you jump to any conclusion about my newly found path of narcissism, hold your horses. J This past week, my husband was off from work. Since we weren’t traveling anywhere, to give him company, I decided to indulge in “staycation.” Still loathe the word, but I now understand the concept. For me, this was the first week of rest in 2010. So, I decided to take a break

As I celebrate my one-year anniversary of freedom

2010-12-23T09:24:00.005-05:00

It’s that time of the year when majority of people party and pause in the same breath. They take out a notepad (mental or literal) and make a list of New Year resolutions. And few even tally if they truly followed up with last year’s determination. It’s that feeling of control. That adrenaline rush that comes from the hope: The ability to change the upcoming year. To have

Honey, I am home...

2010-12-16T09:31:00.002-05:00

So, the Srivastava-Vikram household is a buzz with holiday festivities. Yes, yes, yes, we are back in town from Dubai, India, and Singapore. And I never want to leave home again. Okay, I kid. Not! Four weeks is a bloody long time to leave your own place even if you spent the entire time working and meeting family/friends. Even when most people are outrageously

Wanted to share

2010-11-23T06:02:00.004-05:00

I am in India after a brief stay in Dubai. The flavors of food and words are flirting with my soul. Family and friends are showering my husband and I with indescribable generosity. My head is full of ideas. My heart is itching to write about my voyage (Believe me, I got tons of anecdotes and tales). My laptop and journal are waiting to be drowned under the pressure of my finger tips. So much to

I have converted

2010-11-09T22:05:00.005-05:00

One of my Nana’s (maternal grandfather) good friend was Muslim. Apparently, one day when my Nani (maternal grandmother) had organized a Satyanarayan Puja, he showed up. She asked him if he wanted the prasad. He accepted it readily with both his hands. But within seconds, he threw the religious offering on the floor, stomped it, and spat on it. My Nana didn’t say anything,

We need writers, not politicians, to make the world a better place, I think!

2010-11-03T17:33:00.008-04:00

I have heard many people say that Arundhati Roy should focus on what she knows best: Literature. Politics isn’t her field, and she should restrict her opinions to books and writing. Okay, here is my question: As a citizen of democratic India, doesn’t she have the right to her opinion just like any of us, including the people who made this ludicrous suggestion? She didn’t

The world’s largest democracies are screwed up

2010-10-28T07:02:00.004-04:00

Section I Not too long ago when a Jewish colleague of mine said, “I love the holidays,” I responded, “You mean Christmas?” She retorted, “I don’t celebrate Christmas! I am not Christian; it’s the holidays for me.” When I said, “I would like to visit your synagogue,” she looked surprised. “Sure. But you will have to seek permission from the rabbi. Maybe get a letter?” I

Confessions of a New Yorker: “I am glad I left America when I did.”

2010-10-20T23:19:00.006-04:00

When I was in London last week, my friend, Tony, said to me, “I am glad I left America when I did. The situation there has become disgusting!” I got defensive and my faced turned red (The same color when a non-Indian makes *nasty* remarks about India). I swallowed my anger along with a sip of wine and asked his reason behind such an accusation. Tony said, “You guys are so

I am alive and here to tell the tale

2010-10-15T20:40:00.004-04:00

In my last blog post, I had hinted at a city I wanted to visit this week while I was in Europe. Given that I was going to be to be in London, for Britain’s first and largest South Asian Literary Festival, I thought I would make a day trip to my artist haven—Paris.But in the past few weeks (or has it been years?), news everywhere has been scary and bloody negative. France and Germany have issued

Does my new passport endanger my life?

2010-10-10T15:47:00.005-04:00

As promised, I am back with part deux of the story. Desis often use the Indian passport as an excuse to justify life’s choices. Somebody we know, who makes it a point to be snarky every time my husband and I make travel plans, once told us that the minute they got their American passport, they would indulge in world travels. When I asked why they couldn’t travel on their

All passports come with a baggage—part #1

2010-10-01T09:07:00.002-04:00

I believe, a significant number of desis, who move to the United States, have a two-dimensional focus: (a) Get a U.S. passport (b) Have kids in the United States, so if all fails you can still stick around in the country -- thanks to the nationality of their US-born children. In fact, if there are ten desis in a room, conversations about permanent residence and citizenship

Wanted in India

2010-09-26T09:03:00.004-04:00

I love India and the simple complexities and complex simplicities she offers at her airports. Each experience has a novel hidden inside it. Like most people who have voyaged through Indian customs/immigration, I have a few stories stashed under my sleeves. A couple of years ago, my bag was misplaced on my way to Bombay (Mumbai), India. I tried *lodging* a complaint with

Pakistan floods: why are the donations so low?

2010-09-13T18:04:00.012-04:00

Pakistan was hit with a tragedy in late July of this year. The floods have left millions homeless and caused massive devastation. International aid agencies are hoping to prevent an outbreak of water borne diseases. [1]U.N. and U.S. officials declared the Pakistan flooding to be worse than the 2004 Asian tsunami, the 2005 Pakistan earthquake and the Haiti earthquake combined. Yet, the donations

Learn about colors with poetry

2010-09-08T19:00:00.010-04:00

Dear all, Thirteen months ago, I signed my first, meaningful book contract with Modern History Press. Today the final product is ready. The hint of autumn in the air brings my new chapbook of poems, “Kaleidoscope: An Asian Journey of Colors.” The book is available for purchase in: US, UK and everywhere else in the world! About the book: The book delves into the implication and philosophy of

My first: a story that must be told

2010-09-07T02:39:00.004-04:00

In August of 2009, I signed my first, meaningful book contract. It was for my chapbook of poems, “Kaleidoscope: An Asian Journey of Colors,” with Modern History Press. I was a newbie in the publishing world then sending out query letters to publishing houses. Quite a few of them got back to me and several didn’t. A significant number of editors expressed interest in my

Do desis have a white complex?

2010-09-01T20:33:00.006-04:00

A couple of days ago, my husband and I went to the Indian Consulate. Over a decade of living in NYC, and this was my first time there. A few years ago, when we needed to renew our passports, I couldn’t go because I worked for a company with “strict” come-and-leave-at-such-and-such-time policy. Anyway, I was impressed with the architecture of the building. We can all agree

Ground Zero: Whose “ground” is it?

2010-08-18T23:11:00.006-04:00

Last morning, a few of my friends and I got into a debate. So much so, that we flooded a friend’s wall on Facebook with our opinions. Sorry, S:-). What did we discuss? The newest, unnecessarily politicized issue of whether to build a mosque and Islamic community center near Ground Zero. If you don’t already know the controversy, here is the deal in a

Are you living with bitchier and dumber?

2010-08-10T09:57:00.012-04:00

Look around the room. I mean that figuratively. You will definitely find one person who is dumb and bitchy in your friend circle or family or in your universe of acquaintances. If nowhere else, at least in the world of politics. The kind of person, who irrespective of their age, gender, or race stirs up trouble. The reason? My guess is as good as yours: either to gain attention or just for the

Is the Big Apple a poisoned fruit?

2010-08-05T06:19:00.003-04:00

Towards beginning of this week, I went to a party for writers on a recovered boat. It was an experience I will cherish and carry to my grave. The weather, the people, the temperature, and the music were all perfect. It’s true; you can live all your life in New York and yet discover a breathtaking place every week. But as a bunch of us got talking, a friend’s friend, who is

Here it is...

2010-07-25T11:29:00.020-04:00

Happy Friday, everybody! Most of you know that Modern History Press recently published my chapbook of poems “Because All Is Not Lost: Verse On Grief.” On the same day, UK-based VAANI interviewed me. It's official; UK knows that I love to chat and dance. :-) Click here to read the interview: http://www.vaani.org/2010/07/

Learning time management from a Bollywood dancer

2010-07-22T05:39:00.002-04:00

The other day, a friend of mine (in India) was complaining about paucity of time. I said to her, “You don’t know what time crunch really means until you have lived in the west. At least you come home to readymade food, clean house, and children clad in night clothes.” I cannot emphasize enough that I don’t mean that people in Asia have more time or an easy schedule. Not at

There is something wrong if food served is the size of a butt!

2010-07-08T06:29:00.002-04:00

My Dad says that cooking is eighty percent heart, ten percent science, and ten percent art. You can tell that food is an integral part of our lives. While there are a few who eat to live, I love my food with passion. The whole nine yards: purchasing, cooking, and entertaining. Uttering food, burden, and compromise in the same breath is sacriligeous for me. Maybe because my

Want a detox?

2010-06-27T08:36:00.004-04:00

A lot of you know that I was in California until yesterday. A couple of days in the Bay Area with the family (and a heartwarming reading at San Jose Public Library) followed by an intensive writing workshop in San Francisco. I am still exhausted. The workshop, Voices of Our Nations Arts Foundation (VONA) hosted at University of San Francisco, will always remain special to

Do people enjoy the taste of BS?

2010-06-17T06:45:00.002-04:00

I recently watched one of the latest Bollywood releases: Rajneeti. A good movie with fabulous actors and even better acting. But Ranbir Kapoor’s (The leading male protagonist in the movie) role in the movie left me wondering about moral values. Do you have to be scheming and calculating to get ahead in life? And is it always the ones you least expect that end up weaving webs

A humble thank you to my third parent

2010-06-04T06:39:00.001-04:00

Last week, a friend of mine said to me, “Times might have changed, but everything said and done, how many Indian men, from our generation, do you know who didn’t follow the traditional career path of medicine and engineering?” I looked at her and said, “Plenty.” Baffled by my response, she said, “I don’t know a single person.” As South Asians, we are taught (often times

Death is the informant

2010-05-23T11:34:00.002-04:00

We all grew up listening to this quote from Shakespeare: “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.” The quote is simple, yet it carries a slightly altered meaning depending on your age, time, and place. For teenagers infatuated by their sweethearts, summer vacations explain this quote. For immigrants, the annual or once in two years trip to their motherland might hold the same

What is home?

2010-05-13T08:17:00.002-04:00

The older I get, the blurrier the definition of home becomes for me. Is it where I was born or is it the dwelling where I spent maximum number of years growing up or is it the place my husband and I started our lives together? Do geographic boundaries matter or is home truly where your heart is? By that token, can you have multiple homes because my heart is in New York, in

An interesting month

2010-04-29T08:03:00.005-04:00

So, I am back in the concrete jungle called New York City. After just three weeks of country-living, I can't believe the blaring of horns startled me. On the first day after my return, that is. Anyway, I had a fabulous trip. Memorable experiences. Met interesting people. Interacted with generosity. Compared and traced history. Learnt lessons in trust. Indulged in gourmet food. Drank pure wine.

Stranded but alive

2010-04-19T17:35:00.007-04:00

Hi all,Thank you for all the love. I have received such generous notes from people enquiring about my welfare; I feel truly blessed. Just wanted to inform everyone that I am alive and kicking. And no, I am not buried under any volcanic ash. Apparently, that's what some of the news channels in Asia have been talking about. Some of you know that our original plan was to celebrate my husband's

Indians and Americans could learn a thing or two

2010-04-08T06:04:00.002-04:00

Have you heard the sound of silence? Do you remember the last time you ate lunch on a weekday day pretending you were on vacation? Have your thoughts ever been as still as the lilies growing in an old pond? Have you ever been able to detach your brain from your body, I am not talking about meditation classes, and just let go? I don’t think I have ever completely learnt to

Technology: A boon or curse?

2010-04-01T22:23:00.003-04:00

Globalization affects people in different ways. Because of it, humans have moved away in search of better opportunities. But technology ensures that emotional distances don’t get created with increasing physical distances. Although for someone who doesn’t want to stay in touch, geographic dislocation would only be an excuse for aloofness. However, we won’t talk about “those”

I need help

2010-03-27T08:42:00.002-04:00

Recently, a dear friend’s father was admitted in the hospital. Thankfully, he’s out of the ICU now. Sharing any further details would be inappropriate, so let’s just send healing energy his way. As a part of her update on Facebook, she wrote couplets from the Quran. Beautiful words about faith and healing directed towards her ailing father. Her scribble made me realize how

Bring it on because I am ready!

2010-03-18T07:12:00.003-04:00

Recently, at one of the Bollywood award ceremonies, Bomin Irani won a significant award for his role in 3 Idiots. In his acceptance speech, he said that he got into Bollywood at the age of forty-four. And so if he could challenge himself at that age, anyone could follow his or her dream. I was beyond impressed. A couple of months ago, I had hinted that I was going to make a

Taking a moment to say hello!

2010-03-11T08:20:00.002-05:00

Hello from bucolic living at its best! I am away this week at one of the oldest writer’s residencies in America. It’s in the middle of nowhere. I mean that literally. The residency is atop a hill, and it is surrounded by copious amounts of snow. The closest civilization is reachable only by car. There are no grocery stores, yoga studios, gas stations, or humans near where I

Dude, take a break!

2010-03-04T05:07:00.004-05:00

Let me start this post with a disclaimer: I am a huge fan of Karan Johar and his films. They, almost, always have a unique viewpoint and are class apart. But lately, in my opinion, he’s making movies that fall outside the realm of his expertise. He might try and position them as “love stories,” but nah! Somehow his experimental films don’t work as well. The Bollywood buff

Childhood massacred: How can we stop this tragedy?

2010-02-26T07:34:00.002-05:00

I was recently in India. It was a 15-day trip spread across five cities. Hectic for sure, but it gave me the opportunity to talk to people about the latest trends, culture, society etc. and make my own observations about different parts of the country. The cities were unique in many ways, but the pressures of childhood were equally heart-wrenching everywhere.As I chatted

Where are social services when you need 'em?

2010-02-17T03:19:00.004-05:00

So, my husband and I were in India the last couple of weeks. It was a wonderful trip! We met many of our dear, loved ones – both family and friends. In fact, I am still homesick. Anyways, on our return, as we boarded the aircraft with a heavy heart and memories of an extraordinary visit, Lady Luck nudged and said, “All good things must come to an end.” Our 14-hour flight

Steve Jobs (CEO of Apple Inc.) does it again!

2010-01-27T16:08:00.011-05:00

If you watched the news earlier today, you must have heard that Apple Inc. unveiled its anticipated, rumored, new tablet device - iPad Tablet. You know, just when I thought Apple couldn't revolutionize technology any further, Steve Jobs and his posse proved me wrong! Boy, am I glad they manage to tickle my writer-fingers every single time! They create products that redefine “handsomeness” and

What are you going to be doing?

2010-01-13T21:43:00.004-05:00

Welcome to the New Year and a new decade! Hope you all had a good holiday season. You might feel that I am a little late in wishing everybody but then think again. See, until the first week of January, people aren’t really receptive to the outer world. Can you blame them? With the general festivities, innumerable parties, vacations, relaxed season, and pumpkin lattes over, the first week of

Santa Does Exist - Book Launch in December

2009-12-18T05:25:00.012-05:00

So, you haven’t heard from me in a while. No philosophical opinions have hit your inboxes in the past few weeks. I have had few people ask me the reason for my delayed blog posts. Nope, it’s not end-of-year exhaustion. If anything, I am an Energizer Bunny in December. :-) This month has been rather busy at work and holiday parties have taken over my life. I am not complaining about the

Should mum be the word?

2009-11-29T09:11:00.003-05:00

With age, hopefully, we all mature. So do our convictions. As I grow older, I feel more and more cemented in my belief system. I am a passionate woman with opinions and do not shy away from expressing them.Years ago, my husband said to me, “When people ask for your honest opinion, they don’t really expect you to be candid with them.” I was baffled by the human hypocrisy. Why ask for the truth

Book Launch - I wish I were in Toronto

2009-11-22T07:20:00.014-05:00

I have said to a few of my friends that I loathe November 2009 with a passion. Well, I have my reasons and let’s not get into them right now. Anyways, I am glad the awful month is coming to an end. Tomorrow marks the beginning of the last week of the eleventh month of the year. And guess what happens tomorrow? Earlier this year, one of my stories got selected in an anthology titled, “Her Mother’

Do you ever get over it?

2009-11-14T09:50:00.004-05:00

Someone very dear to me said, "Unless you go through it (meaning, face a personal loss), you can't fathom the pain." I think I know what they mean. To me, the impact of loss is directly proportional to your equation with the person who has passed away. Every adage indicates that time is the best healer. That people forget their worst nightmare and painful experiences, as

Do you know what you are doing?

2009-11-05T05:57:00.002-05:00

Someone dear to me once confessed that, for them, reading my blogs was the easiest way to find out what was on my mind that week. Touché. At parties, I have had random people walk up to me and tell me that they read my blog and/or forward it to their friends and family overseas. I am grateful to everyone who takes out the time to indulge my “Rants of the week,” but it also

Do dreams have to vanish when you open your eyes?

2009-10-22T12:04:00.001-04:00

As I settle back into reality, which hasn't been a piece of cake after two blissful weeks in the company of my true self, like-mindedness, dreams, peace, gourmet food, and words, my brain is teased with thoughts and unanswered questions. I spent the first few days, upon my return, in trance. The noise surrounding me was like the drums playing in the background - persistent yet rhythmic, but I was

All good things come to an end

2009-10-15T01:39:00.007-04:00

Wise people say, when you are having fun, time flies by. That’s exactly what happened. Sigh! My two-week writer’s residency finishes today. It was like yesterday that I almost threw up my breakfast on an eight-seat propeller plane, thanks to fear-stricken fellow passengers, who continued to read the safety manuals loudly—in case our plane crashed into the water. Ironically, sometimes, death could

Reincarnation: Traveling with “Masala Chai” and “Maggi Noodles”

2009-10-01T05:16:00.003-04:00

Some of you know that I got accepted, at a writers' residency program, in New England. I am going away for two weeks. My husband teases me every time we talk about the opportunity and calls it my "vacation." Hello, not worrying about work deadlines or cleaning for two weeks or guiltlessly drinking wine mid-week or writing endlessly doesn't qualify this defined period of time as “vacation.”

Small-mindedness: One of life’s biggest tragedies

2009-09-17T05:50:00.002-04:00

Last week’s blog post evoked an interesting, variety of responses - a revealing ride into human mindsets. We all know that it takes all sorts to make the world. And I feel that everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion. My parents have always said, “Personal experiences and conscience influence how people express themselves in any situation.” I couldn’t agree more.Constructive criticism is

How can we feel guilty when you started it?

2009-09-10T05:03:00.004-04:00

When I was working on my master’s thesis at Columbia University, I did extensive research on the dynamics of “empty-nest syndrome,” amongst Indian parents whose children live abroad. Empty-nest syndrome is the name given to a psychological condition that can affect a woman around the time that one or more of her children leave home. [1] For women in their 50s and above in

Are we killing our parents?

2009-09-03T10:08:00.002-04:00

No culture is perfect. It’s up to us, as individuals, to pick and choose the best elements representative of the east and the west. For instance, I respect most of the values of the east and cherish the feeling of familial-bondage. In the same breath, I also admire how age isn’t a deterrent for any dreams in the west, and I am beginning to appreciate what the west teaches you about dependency.I

What’s the four-letter word that impacts us the most?

2009-08-27T16:46:00.003-04:00

I am sure; the answer to my question would differ from person to person. Needless to say, depending on the frame of your mind or the emotion consuming you at a given point, your response might fluctuate. I know mine does. It could be love, hate, glee, loss, gain etc. This week’s blog post is a journey through the four-letter word that shook up my world last week: loss. Again, loss can be

Americanized Phraseology

2009-08-14T05:40:00.002-04:00

Have you ever wondered about how, with time and place, ones usage of words and expressions transform? I didn’t until I became the butt of familial jokes. J My brother teases me when I say, “You might want to do this” or “If I were you, I wouldn’t eat that.” He pokes fun at the formalization and Americanization of my speech. My brother-in-law cracks up every time I say “No

Invitation

2009-08-06T07:11:00.012-04:00

Today, Thursday, August 6th, I will be reading some of my new work at Kiva Cafe, in Tribeca, along with three other poets. I am excited, and I hope you'll be able to join me. It's an intimate (rather small) cafe, so if you decide to indulge me with your presence, you might want to get there early to grab a seat. The readings start at 8p.m. I am on second on the list and should be done by 8:30p.m.

How is it the victim’s fault?

2009-07-24T20:48:00.002-04:00

This morning I read a horrific story about an eight-year-old girl. She was brutally raped, by four boys in Arizona, for ten to fifteen minutes! The boys, ages 9, 10, 13 and 14, lured the girl to a vacant shed by offering her chewing gum. And the rest, as mature readers, I am sure you can infer. But the girl’s parents, West African immigrants, accused

Are they bitchier?

2009-07-23T12:12:00.002-04:00

Let me cut to the point and add a disclaimer, if I may, before you begin to read this post. I am not trying to be a feminist, a human rights activist, or a gender-equality opportunist; a humorist, yes maybe that. That's what I am trying to be.Incessant channel flipping the other night made me pause on one television show - Desperate Housewives. I used to watch the show at one point, but like most

When can you do it?

2009-07-19T20:38:00.003-04:00

Apologies, I have been a tad irregular with my posts off late. I am working on a big deadline, and I just haven’t had the time or energy to pen my thoughts in the ‘Pandora’s section.’ One fine day, I recognized my over-commitment, and decided to give myself a pamper-session -- in a girlie sort of way. I decided to go to a nail salon and indulge in an invigorating manicure/

Can a legend ever die?

2009-07-09T10:37:00.002-04:00

I was introduced to Michael Jackson's music by my brother. I can’t exactly remember how old I was, but I do remember that he and I were in school then. See, we both went to boarding schools, 28 kilometers away from each other, in the northern part of India. His was in a valley; mine was stuffed inside a hill station. My brother's really close friend, who lived in South Africa then, would download

Suppressing Voices!

2009-06-25T12:05:00.002-04:00

In my poetry workshop the other night, a classmate asked if I was going to blog about Iran at all. I promised him that I would. The reason I haven’t so far is because the Iran-mayhem has evoked multitude of emotions.My ex-boss, who I adore, is an Iranian Jew. He and his family fled Iran when the Islamic Revolution took place. They somehow managed to escape from the country and after spending

Experience of a lifetime

2009-06-18T06:06:00.002-04:00

“How was it?” “Tell me about it ASAP!” From friends to family members to a few coworkers, (who know about my writing commitments), everyone has been asking about my trip to Chicago. I was there from June 11-14, 2009 attending Kriti Festival. I was one of the panelists. In a nutshell, Kriti is a South Asian literary festival, which provides four days of non-stop literati

Back from Heaven!

2009-06-14T23:48:00.003-04:00

Sorry for no blog posts last Thursday and thanks for the sweet notes saying you missed my rants. I was in Chicago, at a literary festival, as one of the panelists. I will blog about the event, in details, this coming week as a snippet wouldn't do justice to this spectacular event. In the meantime, if you'd like, browse through http://www.desilit.org/kriti.php for the event details.

Mind Your Own Business

2009-06-04T08:58:00.006-04:00

We live in an over communicated world where most people feel entitled to an opinion on just about anything. “Have mouth; must speak.” Nothing wrong with expressing what’s on your mind but in a civilized society, there have to be parameters. What happened to “Live and let live?” Two people don’t have to agree on the same issue or feel the exact same way to co-exist in this society. Mutual respect

Who am I?

2009-05-28T09:15:00.003-04:00

When my brother and I were growing up, my mother always said, “With age, your roots call out to you.” Of course, as a teenager, I shrugged her postulation, but today, I concede. She was right. Over the years, I feel the Indian in me has become thirsty and wants to find out about my ancestry. I mean, I know what I was told, but there has to be more. For instance, a little while ago, I found out

(B)rat-remedy

2009-05-21T09:04:00.003-04:00

The other day, a friend of mine attended a pre-school admissions workshop, in NYC, for her toddler. Her description of the other mothers (very - Stepford wives) and their inquisitiveness about anyone, who didn’t look like them (They asked my friend which planet she was from), reminded me of a book I recently read--“Schooled” by Anisha Lakhani.I won’t call Schooled the “World’s Best Book,” but it

When did you feel it?

2009-05-14T06:59:00.001-04:00

My generation is held culpable for whining about age all the time. It’s true; age and weather predominate our conversations. Maybe we have matured ahead of time due to our lifestyles and work stress. I think, work-life balance is the cruelest myth ever!Every single time I say, "I am getting old," the older people yell me at. For someone in their fifties or sixties, thirty is the sweet age of

Burberry on a writer's salary

2009-04-30T05:16:00.007-04:00

Every time I go to a creative meet or mingle with fellow ink-scribbling-Mac-loving-day- dreaming humans, I feel, the raw, passionate, frugal artist in me come out alive and slay the worldly corporate creature. If someone measured my aura post those interactions, I promise you, they’d be intrigued by the halo around my heart :-) I enter a state of timeless trance, and everything around becomes a

What would life be without it?

2009-04-23T09:10:00.003-04:00

A very near and dear one once said to me, “I couldn’t marry someone who wasn’t ambitious. If the person is complacent themselves, how would they understand my ambition and what will they teach the generation after?” With time, I seem to see the reality in the confession.The other day, a friend called me a true prototype of my Zodiac sign—ambitious. I couldn’t agree more; I am a classic Capricorn

My ears feel abused

2009-04-16T14:24:00.002-04:00

Anyone, who has taken the subway in NYC, has probably encountered creepy preachers. Maybe not several times but at least once. They go on an exhausting verbal rant about their set of religious beliefs and faith and life. How their God is the only savior for the mortal degenerates like us. I am so tempted to say “Stuff it stupid,” but the wuss in me avoids the confrontation. I know someone who

What will my generation pass over?

2009-04-09T09:43:00.004-04:00

The Jewish holiday of Passover began yesterday at sundown. Most of my Jewish friends and colleagues either worked from home or left office early to get home on time for Seder. Our conversation in the past couple of weeks has involved at least five mentions of “Passover.” In fact, this year, a few of my friends organized Seder (with loads of traditional Jewish food) at their place and invited even

The unexplored possibilities

2009-04-02T10:33:00.006-04:00

Over the past few days, I have either watched esoteric movies or had conversations with friends about the most occult topics. Replaying those dialogues, themes, and conversations in my mind has led me to think that we, as humans, choose to see only what our mind allows us to. We take the obvious for granted. Denial is the mantra. What we don’t know can’t hurt. But what if our philosophy is wrong?

If I dream, why do you scream?

2009-03-26T11:42:00.005-04:00

As a child, I had one unswerving dream; I wanted my name on the cover of a book. I didn’t know what it would take, but I knew I wanted to be a published author. In my dreams, I have sat through award ceremonies and rehearsed my acceptance speech. Though pragmatism and life’s journeys steered me away from professional writing, fate brought me back to it in a rather interesting way. A few of you

Solution: Get the brother and sister married!

2009-03-19T09:11:00.002-04:00

In college, I had a very close friend whose mom was Jewish. Looking at her, no one could have ever guessed her ethnic background. Her accent, demeanor, persona were all so desi, for lack of a better term. I was always amazed at how “Indian” she looked in a sari or salwar kameez and how effortlessly she cooked two of my favorite dishes, chicken biryani (Chicken pilaf with rice) and rajma/chawal (

What Jhumpa Lahiri taught me

2009-03-12T09:50:00.003-04:00

Last week was SAWCC’s literary festival. One of the evenings, in particular, was very special to me. Author Jhumpa Lahiri graced aspiring word-dabblers with her literati presence. Both the child and the writer in me were so happy to see and hear the maestro up, close, and personal. The exhilarated audience wanted to know so many things about her writing - style, form, inspirations, influences,

Phoenix Mumbai

2009-03-05T09:26:00.002-05:00

Today I feel helpless, like the soldier boywith an amputated leg, who wants to fightbut the shackles of reality won't let him. I sawinnocent hopes and dreams being crushed, Iheard civilians cry and media go awry. Stopthis cowardice and fight like a soldier-- if you areone. When the night poured in, your viciousnessflooded our lives, wiping the vermillion off women'shair and making the mothers'

It’s Dog, dawg!

2009-02-26T09:21:00.002-05:00

I saw Slumdog Millionaire on the day of Christmas with my husband and few non-Indian friends (I’ll talk about the significance of “non-Indian” a little later). In these past couple of months, I have come across innumerous blogs on the movie—mostly all emotion-laden. I wanted to wait until the Oscars, the epitome of commercial accolade, before I shared my two cents. Believe me, not expressing when

An ode to memories

2009-02-21T09:08:00.002-05:00

A few days ago, my husband and I got back from an exquisite, enjoyable, and adventurous vacation in Cancun. The color of the sky and the water were a mirror reflection of each other. From a touristic perspective, I wouldn’t categorize Cancun under “One of the places to see before I die.” It’s enjoyable, period. Spain, Greece, Italy, Tunisia and Turkey (from my perspective) fall under the “Got to

Are South Asian gays happier than their straight counterparts?

2009-02-12T09:27:00.001-05:00

Couple of nights ago, I was at an event/panel session, titled “Tell Me a Story,” organized by the South Asian Women’s Creative Circle (SAWCC). It was a déjà vu moment for me since a few months ago I had presented my work as a panelist. That was a momentous occasion in my ordinary life. I value the focus of SAWCC and especially these panel sessions where South Asian creative women get a platform

Do better brands make you better?

2009-02-05T10:40:00.002-05:00

We live in a branded world and sadly but truly, even death doesn’t do us part. I have heard that even funeral homes rely on branding to generate interest in prospective clients, aka-- future cadavers. Fascinating! Now you can lie in peace for eternity in a brand name of your choice. We humans can be such conscious planners.:-)Think about it; brand names are applicable to every aspect of our daily

The easily offended types!

2009-01-29T13:08:00.002-05:00

Have you been in situations where you have been confronted (badgered) by people for not telling them certain noteworthy news when they deemed it appropriate? It could have been news about a new job, an accomplishment (personal or professional), a new car or an apartment or a vacation or just about anything. These people expect you to NOT waste even a nanosecond and turn into an open book. If you

Why do we judge?

2009-01-22T19:55:00.006-05:00

It’s human nature to judge others and by doing so, feel good about the self-fulfilling prophecy of “I know best.” Sometimes we human beings become critical of others to justify our own existence and defend our personal choices; other times, it’s because of the polar opposite mindsets and attitudes. I have to give us mere mortals the benefit of the doubt. Often times, given the paucity of time in

Trash or Stud? - Disturbing Double Standards

2009-01-15T09:51:00.001-05:00

Growing up, I remember hearing certain words buzz around my good, Indian girl existence—“Girls should be shy.” Shyness was thought of as an Indian woman’s jewel. It won a woman kind words and got her maximum points in the eyes of the pretentious and judgmental society. The more you draped and covered, the more dignified you were considered which brings me to another point -- about saris. You

Demise is the word!

2009-01-12T09:40:00.002-05:00

A very Happy New Year to all! Let me start by apologizing for missing in action the past few weeks. I took a short writing hiatus to enjoy the holiday season Oscar Wilde style – “Moderation is a fatal thing, Lady Hunstanton. Nothing succeeds like excess.” I treated myself to decadence and opulence after all the craziness of the year. Well, every action has a food-related reaction in my life. To